Please excuse the wall of text & I may ramble on a bit because there is a lot of info to be conveyed...
I'm sort of at a loss of what to do, and I'm not sure if it's my fault or not. To start, we do live together and have for probably 2 years. Before we moved in together I used to come over to her apt and we would have sex pretty much every single day and it was amazing. We moved in together within a year and a half because my current living situation kind of sucked and we got along well together so thought, hey, why not give it a go. Everything was great for a few months until slowly, our sex life started to space out from once a day to once every few days to twice a week to now about 2 years later sometimes once a week, and it's 95% initiated by me.
We don't have similar hobbies, but that's fine, as long as I can do mine and she can do hers then it's all fine and dandy. She loves to cook, & I like to play video games. We both enjoy working out so we usually go to the gym together. I have other hobbies as well, I love collecting/shooting guns, I've built my own PC, built my own AR, build Gunpla (Zoids included), I enjoy screen acting (just got back from LA for receiving a Best Actor award for my most recent short film), etc... Point is, I have a lot of other hobbies that I like to do to keep myself busy. My GF on the other hand besides cooking (which you can't exactly do all the time) enjoys yoga (which the classes are a set time) & makeup stuff (has thought about maybe reviewing diff types of makeup for like a blog, but never acted on) and that's really about it.
To add some more context, the city we live in now & met each other in, when I moved here I didn't know anyone & I met her within 3 months of living here. From there, she introduced me to her friends who were mainly guys. We quickly all clicked & now I consider them to be some of my best friends, & slowly over time, they started texting me to hang out instead of her which she is kind of self-conscious about. She doesn't really have any good girlfriends in the city either because her best friend moved away (~2 years ago), & the rest aren't really that fun.
Anyway, she has started going to a therapist starting in December, & she's taking medicine for anti-anxiety/depression. We had a long talk about things last night which kind of didn't solve anything. She basically said that her sex drive has disappeared and she doesn't know why, as well as any drive to be social with people. To which I responded everything was fine until we moved in together, what am I doing wrong? She wanted to get a dog, and we got a dog spite me not wanting to get a dog because, honestly, I didn't want the responsibility (don't worry, since we've gotten him, I've come to love the pup & he's well spoiled now). She has been very stressed out at work the past few months which doesn't help. But during our talk, she tells me she wants me help cooking, okay that's fine I don't mind helping even though I don't like cooking & it's her hobby. Then she says that I need to help do laundry more, okay, I put away my clothes & hers whenever she folds them or lays them out to be hung up, she got mad at me before because I put something of hers in the dryer when I wasn't supposed to and it shrunk & she's got mad because she doesn't like the way I fold clothing. Then she says that I need to help clean more, I do the dishes (maybe once a week I'll forget to do them, but it's not often), and I ask her why don't we deep clean on a weekend when we have more time & don't have to do it after a busy day at work.
After all that she's said, even if I agree to do all this things for her every single day, I will either have 0 time for my hobbies or I will lose sleep to stay up late doing said hobbies. I feel like I'm losing it, and can't tell if I'm crazy or if she's acting kind of crazy. After all that she said about cooking/laundry/cleaning, it's like she's blaming that on why she has no sex drive, or doesn't show me affection anymore. It feels like more of an expensive roommate situation who I buy gifts for and take out to eat and less of like a relationship. If anyone has any advice on either how to either get my hobbies back, or fix the situation please say so. Even if the answer is, well you're just kind of a shit BF and should give up video games, or at least lessen play time to once or twice a week.
tl;dr: GF lost sex drive & drive to be social; I don't know if it's my fault or she's just kind of losing it!
Submitted February 01, 2017 at 10:45AM by fenderc1 http://ift.tt/2kqSHDK
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