So my gf of the last 7 months suddenly out of nowhere told me that she wants to be just friends and doesn't think of me as a bf last week. Last Saturday, we went to a couples cooking class and made out in the car, and she said that she was "on cloud 9". Of course I thought this was wonderful, and that's something that she's said before. In our relationship, we've never had any fights, and drama any typical bullshit. Everyone of our friends calls us #goals
So last week has been a real roller coaster. After Saturday, we both went to uni (different unis, but we live 20 min from each other), but we met up for dinner on Monday and then we had planned on meeting again on Friday for a date. Normal standard procedure. However, when we met up, she said she wanted to talk, and I assumed this meant about spring break or something, since we've never had any difficulties.
She said that she wanted to break up, and my heart dropped, because it took me out of nowhere. I asked her why, and cited her own words that she was in cloud 9, less than a week before. She told me that she came to the conclusion that she thought my feelings were "a lake apart from mine". I didn't understand it, and I asked her to explain it more. She said that she doesn't feel butterflies or nerves whenever we do romantic things like make out, kiss, hold hands etc. Finally she said she didn't think she'd ever feel them either.
Now, at this point the shock was wearing off and I told her that I hadn't felt those nerves since Christmas time either, but that that doesn't mean I don't have romantic feelings for her. It just meant that the infatuation and honeymoon phase had worn off.
She didn't really agree with it, and I think that she was basing her belief that the relationship is good until those feelings are gone.
Now, I love her so I told her that I want what's best for her, and if she wants to break up, that I thought it was hasty and a shame to break something so wonderful (and really I do mean wonderful, we're each other's best friends and everything we do and think is in sync).
After Friday I went no contact with her. I saw her Sunday at our church we both go to (that's how I met her), and I talked to her again.
Basically what I said was:
1) I don't agree that you don't have romantic feelings for me.
-she responded that she doesn't feel nerves or butterflies
2) I disagree that my feelings are a lake away; we listed all the reasons that we were attracted to one another and both of us are attracted to each for the same reasons. Furthermore, why would you compare your feelings to mine? -she didn't really have a response to this
3) Our relationship has been nothing but perfect for the last 7 months...it seems really rash to end this wonderful thing over something you felt in less than a week
-so to this she said that she'd take another week and think about it some more and I told her I'd give her space
Fast forward to this week:
I decided no contact would be best, because that way she can see what it's like without me, as well as I get time to recover from the carpet being pulled out from me.
Here's the problem:
She has initiated texts with me every day since Sunday, and I've responded to them as short and briefly as possible. However, last night after I cut the conversation, she prolonged it, to which I told her "look, I want to text and talk to you, but I want to give you the space you need"
To which she said
"I'm confused. I still want to be friends, I'm giving you space to deal with the shock"
At this point, I told her no, and that we're gonna talk again on Sunday, and I told her goodnight and ended it there.
However she texted me again this morning asking if I made it to school okay because there was an accident.
At this point, I'm confused and I'm not sure what to do. I really love her, and I know she loves me, I'm just shocked and confused that she went from being in cloud 9 to having zero feelings in less than a week. Then this week all communication has been from her... I think this is a signal of her missing me, but honestly at this point I'm confused as hell.
So if you've made it this far, thank you.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated
TL;DR
Gf broke up a perfect 7 month relationship with me out of nowhere. She thinks it's cause she has no more romantic feelings with me, despite saying she's attracted to me and that less than a week ago she was on Cloud 9
Submitted March 08, 2017 at 07:29PM by eienebed http://ift.tt/2mDhmFU
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