So I'm a student in the same university as my crush who I met in the beginning of September through my housemate's girlfriend. We met at one of the local bars and it was only a quick conversation as my housemate's girlfriends was introducing me to all her friends and I was also catching up with my friends as well since we just got back from summer break.
The next day i was having lunch with my best friend(who was also with me last night) and we were just talking about everything that happened the night before as we usually do. He casually brings up that she seemed attracted in me, that "she was looking at me in a certain way". At the time i kinda just blew it off and carried on with my day.
Fast Forward 2 weeks later, its my housemate's birthday and we are celebrating at our house, and I start talking to, who would later become my crush. Now I don't necessarily remember what we were talking about as it really was just some small talk, but what I know is that I started to feel a connection towards her. We wound up conversing throughout most of the night; there were so many aspects we had in common such as our love for dogs and marine recreation, our sense of humor, our ambition to travel the world, so many things that we liked and disliked. Our personalities just seemed to match so well, and I kept on feeling that she was really into me, I have never hit it off with someone so strongly and quickly, it felt too good to be real that I must be dreaming. I remember thinking to myself about the remote possibility that I would ever meet another woman like her again.
I didn't try to go any further that night, as usually when I feel this type of way to someone it must be that I just have it all in my head. I also was not sure if the feelings were also reciprocated on her part since I am not so good at picking up those sort of cues. Let's give it some time and see how I feel the next time i meet her.
Over the course of the next few days, all of my friends who were present that night kept on asking how things went with her later on after they left. They were all baffled after I told them "we just talked; I don't think she might be into me anyways". As friends usually do they gave me some good old constructive criticism, telling me I "must be stupid if I didn't realize she was so into me". They also recognized that we were clearly hitting it off so well. I was so mad at myself, as anyone probably would be in my case- not only that the signs were there, but additionally I acknowledged them at the time and still didn't do anything about it.
As always when you have a crush with someone, you cant stop thinking about them. She was who I thought when I was alone in my thoughts: during the night, when I'm driving, when I'm in class, when I'm cooking and eating, when I'm exercising, when I'm getting ready after I wake up or before i go to bed. I kept on replaying every single time I ever saw her, wishing I actually would have made some sort of move on her at those times. She's all I think about, I need to do something about this.
I was talking to my housemate's girlfriend a few weeks after when she was over my place, my crush wound up coming up in conversation, and I casually asked if she was single. my housemate's gf told me a few points:
1) She had a boyfriend from her hometown whom she has been going out with since her junior year of high school. He currently goes to another school the other direction from her home about 500 miles away from our university.
2) He recently broke up with her, a little after I talked to her that night, for a reason I do not know(none of my business). It may or may not be due to complications of a long distance relationship, they both have been for at least 2 years which is quite long but could also be long enough. She is actively trying to get back together with him and they most likely will.
3) She isn't really quite fond of the men in our school. They are very aggressive to try and get with her and thinks most of them are douchebags. (quite a generalization and a criteria I definitely don't meet)
Personally, I am not a big fan of long distance relationships and don't really think anyone should be I certainly wouldn't want to be in one. Anyways we are in school 38 weeks out of the year, that leaves 14 weeks a year for her to actually see him.
After I found this out, I felt very ambivalent towards it. Its good that I didn't try to go any further with her at the time, she wasn't single and that would have ruined any chance I had with her, but yet again she still isn't single. Although this did raise more questions to me, why was she clearly so into me even when she was with someone else?
Either way I wasn't going to wait for her, that's stupid and a waste of time. She wound up getting back together with him. I went on with my life, but my thoughts of her never did. I should have done something during that small window of time when she was single and I regret that.
I would still wind up seeing her over the course of the semester and those moments of attraction never stopped between us, in fact they got more intense. there were moments where we held hands and would physically get close with each other(admittedly usually when we were drunk) but it never lead to anything more than that. Anyways I wouldn't want to make a move on her, I dont really think it would be the wisest idea to be in any sort of relationship with someone when it started by her cheating.
Usually at this point I would have moved on but this is an acute form of attraction I am feeling towards her.
Currently things seem to be going fine with her boyfriend at the moment as evidenced by her social media and the fact that it is currently part of the 1/5th of the year they actually see each other.
tl;dr: I have a crush on someone, who is also interested in me, but is in a relationship with someone of 4 years and has been a long distance relationship for 2 years.
Submitted January 13, 2017 at 04:56AM by tutles21 http://ift.tt/2jqmwAW
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