Basically, I will try to make this short. I met my boyfriend at work a few months ago. He took me out on dates and we hit it off really well. He officially asked me to be his girlfriend and despite having two daughters, he makes time for me and treats me very well. He cooks for me, does little favors for me, buys me little gifts to remind me that he is thinking of me, etc. So far he has been the most mature guy I have ever been with. He's extremely hard-working and it feels good to be with someone who is responsible for a change.
I have had bad luck with men and have always caught them cheating. As a result, I have pretty bad trust issues that I am trying to work through in therapy. In the past, when I have caught boyfriends cheating I have exploded, become physically violent, etc.
A couple of hours ago, my boyfriend was in the kitchen surprising me by cooking me breakfast. I know I shouldn't have, but he left his phone on my bed and I know his password, so I took a peek at it. I noticed he had some old, sporadic text messages from his co-worker "G." She's young, and looks like Angelina Jolie, so obviously I feel a bit insecure that he is texting her on and off. I know they have worked together for a few years and have a good work relationship. He did not say anything outwardly disrespectful in the text messages but I did notice that when they both went on a work trip to California two months ago, he texted her to "come up to his room once she woke up because he needed a lighter."
The fact that she went up to his room alone makes me extremely uncomfortable. Then around Thanksgiving, it seems that she had a problem with her TV set and she asked him if he could fix it. He did, and sent her a photo and apparently returned it to her later on that week.
Then there are other little text messages that seemed a bit flirtatious in nature like him telling her "calm down baby" or "you're a fat girl" or even telling her that he owed her lunch for her birthday a month ago.
These things make me extremely uncomfortable but I do not know if they are just good friends and I am overreacting. I just find it very strange that he has never really mentioned her before or mentioned doing any of these favors for her.
I thought about approaching him later on tonight but I do not want to tell him that I went through his phone. How do I approach this!? I don't want to resort back to my ways of become volatile and throwing around accusations. HELP!
tl;dr: Texts between my boyfriend and his co-worker seem a little too close for comfort. I want to approach him but don't know how to.
Submitted December 24, 2016 at 12:35PM by youryummybuddy http://ift.tt/2hiSKiH
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